I feel you have lot of information about horoscope matching from various places which is insufficient and hence you are in a state of confusion.
I suggest that what you need to do is take one of my paid consultations as you have many questions and many more will follow.
Horoscope Matching Kundali Milan is a detailed Guna and Grah milan analysis which I write. This report written by me will look at the following.
1. Any dosha in your compatibility – Like Mangal, Nadi, then I will provide you with detailed analysis if it gets cancelled or Not. What are the remedies that you should do.
2. Grah Milan analysis – That is the detailed analysis of all planets in both horoscopes.
3. Analysis of 7th house and its lord – 7th house is the prime house of marriage. What does your 7th house suggest in terms of marriage.
This is a very detailed horoscope analysis with remedies and it will cover all of your questions.
Please read this article which I have written. It is what you should be doing.