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Guilty of an abortion – badly in need of advice

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This topic contains 1 reply, has 2 voices, and was last updated by  Navneet Khanna 10 months, 2 weeks ago.

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  • #14001 Reply

    Snehal Mehta


    I came across your useful blog and wanted your advice badly.

    I have been married for past 5 years. My married life has been filled with lot of fights, we are not compatible with each other’s parents.

    I recently found out I was pregnant, but my husband was not ready to have a baby even after 5 years. I begged a lot but he did not agree, we fought about the child. No one from his family supported me and I had to abort the child unwillingly.

    I don’t understand if he wants to take a divorce and separate from me, because he never speaks clearly when I ask him.

    I feel guilty of killing the baby and miss the child badly. I wanted to know what does my future married life look like. Are there any remedies? Are we going to divorce. I don’t want to live like this any more. I sometimes feel I want to end my life.

    I really want a healthy happy and virtuous baby blessed with long life. I wish for a child who will be intelligent and loving. I wan to be a mother to a successful child who will also do great things for others and will be known for his good deeds.

    Please suggest me some good dates and time of days when we should try for the baby again.

    My and my husband’s birth details are as follows. I really eagerly wait for your advice.

    My current location: Milpitas, California, USA


    DOB: 30/10/1981
    POB: Goregaon, Mumbai
    TOB: 1.10 am


    DOB: 28/09/1983
    POB: Mahim, Mumbai
    TOB: 4.09 pm

    Thank you very very much!


    #14019 Reply

    Navneet Khanna

    I can say that you and your husband need to have a very open and unbiased talk of how you want your relationship to be going forward. I can suggest you dates when you could be pregnant but I do not want that you repeat what has happened earlier.

    As I can see you have severe issues with his parents and they have issues with you. It may be easier than done , but if that is the bone of contention , you need to talk about it with your husband, take him into confidence and handle it. You need to learn to be diplomatic in how you put across the message to your husband. Generally when we want to suggest something , we have a habit of making it into a complaint, which would irritate the other person. So instead of getting him on our side , we only complicate things further.

    You also need to acknowledge that there is a generation gap between his parents and you. They will never think alike. When you have children tomorrow, which I really wish you do, your children would never think like you.

    I feel all problems can be handled provided you and your partner are willing to solve it. And last thing do not blame yourself entirely for the abortion, it was a collective decision and you were not alone in it. The only sad thing is that the tensions at home took its toll on a child which which never came in this world. It is truly sad. I wish that good wisdom prevails on everyone and you and your family finds happiness again.

    Keep fast on Mondays and recite Mantra “Om sarva mangal mangalye shivay sarvathe sadikhe. Sharnaye triyambake gauri narayani namostuthe” 108 times daily


    Navneet Khanna

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