Hi,
You guys fell in love and got married alright. Your husband has a very strong Mars/Kuja in the 4th house of Homely Comforts, forming a strong Ruchaka Maha-Purusha Yoga. It also makes him a strong Mangalik or somebody who has Kuja Dosha. So, he was a angry young man… not sure how you did not realize that, after dating him for 4-5 years.
Anyways, just so you are aware he was running Maha-Dasha of Rahu (from mid-2000 to mid-2018), placed in the 12th house and more importantly, participates in Sukshma Parivarthana Yoga with Mercury/Budha, at Nakshatra level. So, by nature he might be a bit deceptive/twisted in his thinking.
On the other side, you were running Maha-Dasha of Mercury/Budha (from early 1999 to early 2016). Thereafter, you started Maha-Dasha of Ketu (from early 2016 to early 2023) and currently in the Maha-Dasha of 7th & 12th lord Venus/Shukra. Incidentally, they are conjunct in the 4th house and hence I’m inclined to think you might have gotten a bit detached/abstained and stopped entertaining him and his fantasies from early 2016, precipitating matters and subsequently leading to further detachment/separation. And, you are currently in the midst of Ashtama-Shani or Saturn/Shani-dev’s transit across natal placement of Moon/Chandra…making things a bit more stressful for you. By the way, you seem to have a fair share of pent-up anger yourself and I’m left with a feeling you are not sharing everything about yourself (if not, why would lawyers give such advices is something I’m left wondering about).
In any case, I’m inclined to think legal separation (or divorce) may not happening. So, there is an opportunity for sorting things out and reconciliation. In the given situation it would perhaps make sense for you guys to consider propitiating the afflicted planets/grahas, starting with Rahu-Ketu – the Lunar Nodes. Apart from that, there is a pressing need for good marriage/relationship counselling for both of you (both to validate truth and help accept realities of life) – your father’s weakness (if any) and inability to assert himself for (or lack of other strong personalities to support) your cause is not helping.
Take care…