Dear T.K.Chandrashekhar,
Wow, thank you so much for taking the time to explain all this to me.
Yes, I’m a woman and what you said about lack of proper monthly cycles is like that due to PCOS I was diagnosed with as a teenager. It’s so impressive you could see that.
About all the other tendencies you’ve mentioned – of overthinking and feeling confused when having to take decisions – unfortunately, that’s also true. To be honest, I do think I might have at times overoptimistic view on certain enterprices and then either don’t stick with them when I get disappointed or just see them fail. Which usually makes me feel even more confused afterwards.
As I mentioned in my previous comment, altgough, I’m absolute novice and don’t know anything in Vedic astrology, from what I saw as some placements (Rahu, Saturn, Ketu, Sun, Mars, Pluto) and their houses, it seems to that I might have not been a very good person in past lifes, if we assume those existed. And now what I have to be involved in are more selfless acts that help other people. Probably, even careerwise. I’ve changed a few fields till this point – mainly in corporate office jobs, but didn’t really feel fulfilled in any of them. My university degree was in Diplomacy and International Organizations, and although after graduating I didn’t follow that path, I’ve started wondering now weather I should not try to actually turn to it again and build a career in a non-profit organizations, maybe even abroad. On the other hand, I really enjoy art and writing and have had ideas in trying to make a career in that or maybe develop sth related to them as a side business. I saw that with some of my placements, I think again Saturn and Rahu in particular, starting alone business and relying solely on it for financial matters might not be a good idea. But I might misinterpreted that, so I don’t know how it affects endeavors related to art and writing as a way of earning money, too.
I would be really grateful, if you have time to give me some insight on what you think it would be better for me to focus more out of the above based on what you see in my chart.
About the short life span, to be honest, I kinda have thought about this before even having interest in astrology. And not particularly in very fatalistic way. But more as it feels like a part of me doesn’t let me see myself in a relationship with anyone, as a wife, mother, grandmother or even just getting old in general. It’s not that I particularly don’t want all that to happen. Just it’s very hard to see myself in a scenario like that. And I think because of that, I’ve often wondered whether I would even get to live enough to get to that: marriage, kids, getting old with a family of my own. It’s like I still feel this as a very distant notion from myself even at 33 now – an age when people usually think about relationships, marriage, kids, getting old with someone. And while I think I would really want that at some point in my life, a part of me makes me feel like I just won’t have that, even if I actually try to do it some day. It might just be because parents have always had very turbulent relationship and many problems stemmed from that when I was a kid. So, of course, all of my thoughts on this matter might just be again overthinking and some subconscious fear of failing in sth so important. Which just makes me stay away from it at all. I don’t know.